More Than A 2012 Conqueror

The New Year is coming once again. So it’s either today or tomorrow when people complain about how awful or horrible the past year has been. Interesting enough they’ve made it through, no matter how “bad” it was. I think people and mainly Christians need to learn to appreciate the process. If we look back in Genesis, it took God seven days to create the heavens and the earth. To us seven days is short, but it was a process.  I’ll say this past year 2012, had many different processes I had to go through. At the time I couldn’t appreciate them, in the moment I didn’t understand but I have an appreciation for them. No matter how bad 2012 was to you, you had to go through it to get to 2013. Whether or not you learned what you needed to learn or got what God needed you to get is on you, but you had to go through it. In 2012 I’ve experienced many different things. Things I never would've imagined to ever happen to me. I’ll take you through a brief tour of my 2012.

At the top on the year I was in love with someone who would never love me the same way. I was insecure. I was trying to prove or convince that person that I was worthy. I wanted to be loved SO bad… I went on a few dates with some CRAZY men lol (February was my LAST date ever) I was still unemployed, I was in the club, I almost got snatched by some crazy man downtown, I was suicidal, I felt worthless, I felt like a burden to my family. I don’t know when exactly but sometime in the spring. I went on a fast. I put my focus on my past, how God brought me through before, how he kept me before how he saved me before. I’ve been in church long enough to know that he’s the same God today, yesterday, and forever more. I know that he’s a God that can’t fail I know that he’s a God that can’t lie, that would never leave me no forsake me. So I was on a mission. A mission to find out just how much God loved me. I stayed in my bible searching for how much he cares for me. See it’s not enough for me to believe what you say God said, I want to see it for myself. So I searched and when God says seek and you will find. You surely will find and I found out just how valuable I am to God, Just how much he loves me, just how much he cares, just how much he needs me to fulfill his will, his kingdom business. Once I did that and started trusting God to be who he said he is and put ALL my faith in him is when things started turning around. At this time my prayer was that Kirk Franklin Mali music song “Give me that”. I sung that song every day all day it was my prayer. Things turned around for me. I’ve realized how can God trust us to be faithful when everything is going right, when we aren’t faithful to him when things are bad. How can he trust us with the desires of our hearts if we aren’t faithful to him during the process? So by now I got a job, soon after got a car and my son in school. Everything I needed God provided faster than I could stop praying. Once I STOPPED making it about me and made it ALL about him he moved the mountains. Once I stopped saying I trusted him and actually put those words into action he did everything he said he would do. Now don’t get me wrong I was still being tested. I deleted every “random” person in my phone every negative person anything that had no purpose I got rid of it. Little did I know I was still holding on to the biggest “random”. A “church” friend. I didn’t see this as a friendship without a purpose because we go to the same church talk about God etc. Yea Demons go to church too.  Remember when I said in my previously blog, when we hold on to people or things longer than the season called for, is when chaos and mess start to happen. Yea this situation made me realize that. Long story short, a crime was committed against me. I’m not going to go into details about what happen and certainly will never call a name but in a later blog I will share my experience. That experience also showed me sometimes you have to go through misery for your ministry. Sounds harsh, but how can you minister about things you’ve never been through or dealt with? You can’t really preach about something you don’t know. You can preach about God if you don’t know him. Same concept.  In the mist of all this I was running from my purpose. I know what God laid on my heart, but I didn’t think I was “qualified” to do it. Yep that mean old devil tried to make me think I couldn’t do what God called me to do. Welp obviously I let those thoughts go lol Well actually God just made it happen. Out of nowhere I would get messages in my inbox from young girls seeking help or advice etc. Yea When The Holy Ghost wants to move he will move whether you want him to or not. His will have to be done, so don’t fight The Holy Ghost. Trust me you will lose lol. So yea I’m not longer afraid of what God needs me to do for his kingdom. I’m actually excited. I met with the youth director at my church and I’m ready. Where ever God needs me to go I’m willing to go. No matter what the process looks like. The safest place to be is in the will of God.  So what this blog post was all about was to let you see the things you went through in 2012 HAD to happen. How else are you going to mature if you don’t go through something’s? I mean it’s not always easy, because you have to die to your flesh DAILY!! You have to die to your will and take on God’s will DAILY!!.Nobody never promised me the road would be easy, but I was promised a God that would never leave me and never forsake me and that’s ALL I need. My spiritual growth and awareness is through the roof. My trust in God is crazy. I asked God to make my faith like that of a child and I believe he will get me through whatever 2013 has to offer. Honestly I’m excited for 2013 it’s nothing but up from here. I was raised in the church but my relationship with Christ has NEVER been this strong, so yes I’m grateful for my 2012 process. That stuff had to happen to get me here today. I’m more than a 2012 Conqueror

If you love someone tell them

I love you

Destaynee

http://youtu.be/0IEtds2YW_A -Kadesh by Mali Music