Suicide...

Suicide: The action of killing oneself intentionally

Suicide is a sin, because the bible says thou shalt not kill, which includes yourself.

I bet your wondering why I’m talking about this. Well Last week a girl on twitter was talking about she wanted to commit suicide, I felt led to write about it then, but I didn’t. I was faced to this topic twice this week, so I know it has to be spoken upon.  Suicide is something church folk never really talk about, I can’t recall hearing a sermon about it, or a minister teaching about it, or expressing concerns about it. Suicide is really something that people face, you may not know who or when, but more people face it than you think. I wanted to kill myself because I was depressed. I was depressed because my relationship with Christ wasn’t where it needed to be, so I didn’t have that joy. I didn’t have the security of being in his arms, because I didn’t have faith nor did I trust him. I didn’t care to give my cares to him because I didn’t know nor did I care if he cared. I felt so hopeless and alone I didn’t try to seek his face, I didn’t chase after him I literally did not care!! I didn’t know my worth and I was searching for it in all the wrong places. I was also depressed because I was comparing my situation to other people’s situation; I was comparing my looks to other people’s looks, etc.

Well you’re not depressed now, so how did you come out of it?

Well first you have to understand how or why you’re depressed. I knew I wasn’t living for God, I knew I wasn’t seeking his face at all. I made up in my mind that I wasn’t going to continue to be depressed. I knew I had responsibilities, I knew deep down inside that God needed me for a reason. I believe that was The Holy Spirit. I was so tricked by the devil believing ALL his lies. I believed everything, I believed I was worthless, I had no reason for living, I wasn’t needed, I was ugly, God didn’t care about me etc. I believed all these horrible things, because I wasn’t in the word. The word is our ONLY defense against the devil and his lies and tricks. I made a decision to stop listening to the devil; I made a decision to WANT to be happy. I stopped looking at my life so negatively. I decided to praise God for the thing’s he has done for me in the past, I thanked him every day for everything. I couldn’t focus on what wasn’t happening, I had to focus on how he has already showed up and stepped in on my behalf. I changed my prayers. That song by Kirk Franklin and Mali Music “Give me that” …”Give me that joy I can’t explain, add extra peace that’ll ease the pain, I want that love that’ll never change, give me that give me that” That whole song was my prayer, I listened to it all day every day. That’s when I realized it wasn’t about me, it was never about me, and it was always about God. God has to get the glory out of EVERYTHING. Every situation God has to get the glory. We have to know that we know that we know that God will never leave us, nor forsake us. That’s not just a cute little bible verse, a cliché little saying. No it’s really true God doesn’t lie and he can’t lie, so he will never leave us. (Deuteronomy 13:8 “And the Lord, he it is that doth go before thee; he will be with thee, he will not fail thee, neither forsake thee: fear not, neither be dismayed) If at any point in your walk with Christ you feel that “God is distant”. No God isn’t you are! Evaluate yourself when you feel “God is distant”, are you reading like you used to? Are you spending time with him like you used to? Are you communicating with him like you used? God is a God that can’t change. (Hebrew 13:8 says “Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, and today and forever”. )So if you feel something is different about your relationship with Christ, it’s you not him. When I was depressed I felt overwhelmed, I felt like I was stretched in so many directions and couldn’t do the things I need. I felt like everything was dumped on me and I couldn’t handle it. He knows that we can handle it because he knows that his faith sufficient, we are the problems. We are the ones that don’t either know what God can do or trust him to be who he says he is. Also in my depression I felt lonely and unwanted. I felt lonely because I didn’t have many friends. I’ve never been a click-ish kind of person. I had friends, but I always have like 1 or 2 best friends. So at these times in my depression I didn’t have anyone I could go to. I felt unwanted at the time because I didn’t have a boyfriend and people always asked why I didn’t have a boyfriend, putting that pressure on me, I felt lonely. Once I got to the place where it wasn’t about me, and I wanted to come out of my depression I didn’t worry about that. All I wanted was to have joy and peace and to please God. I figured all that stuff would come when it’s supposed to come, and if God wanted it to come.

Suicide is not the answer; the devil wants us to think that’s the answer or even an option to our problems. Jesus is the answer to ALL of our problems; he should be our only option. There is NOTHING too hard for God. He is omniscient, omnipresent and omnipotent. He is all knowing, he has all the power in his hands. They is nothing he can’t do, the only problem is we have to BELIEVE he can do things. We have to BELIEVE that he is who he says he is and that he can do what he says he can do. The only way we would know these things is by reading the word. Reading the bible to see who God is, spend time in his word getting to know him. While you’re spending time getting to know God you’ll see how he feels about us. You’ll see how valuable you are to him. We already know he sent his son to die for us, but it doesn’t stop there, the bible shows us how he cares for us each and every day no matter what’s happening. I encourage you no matter how long you’ve been saved (which that doesn’t even matter. As long as you’re saved it’s good. People get so hung up on how long someone was been saved, being saved for 15 years doesn’t make you more valuable or useable to the person that JUST gave their life to Christ today. I think people get so hung up on that and use that, that’s not right. We’re all in the body, new or old) you should research the bible and find out exactly how Christ feels about you, See how he feels about you, so you can know for yourself, not just what people are saying.

Jesus really honestly and truly is all we need. He will give us the people we need in our lives if we focus on him and not them. He will give us the tools we need to move forward, because everything we do should be to the building and the uplifting of his kingdom. This life is not about us, but about God and his kingdom, we should be busy fulfilling our calling, and if you don’t know your calling ask God he will tell you. More than likely you already know and you’ve been running from it.

Please be encouraged suicide is not the answer, if your depressed pick up the bible or go to God in prayer, don’t let the devil trick you. One of the battle grounds is the mind, Satan will attack your mind, and the word is our only defense.

If you love someone tell them

I love you

Destaynee