A few months ago, I was asked by someone if the man I
married had to be a preacher or a pastor. I was caught off guard because I
never thought about the position I “wanted” my husband to have in ministry. I’ve
just always wanted the man God ordained for me. If it’s God’s will that he’s a
pastor, so be it. If it’s God’s will he’s an usher, then so be it. The title a person holds/or doesn’t hold
has nothing to do with who they are as a person, let alone their
relationship with Christ. Just because a man tells you he is called to
preach, doesn’t mean he is the man for you, and it doesn’t mean he’ll be a good
husband. –Yes ladies, there are some
cheating pastors out there. - Not only are there cheating pastors out there,
there are folks out there claiming this and that. Might not even be a
Christian, just because they can quote the old and New Testament, doesn’t make
them a Christian. - The bible says in 1
John 4:1 “Beloved, believe not every spirit, but try the spirits whether they
are of God: because many false prophets have gone out into the world.”
It’s important to test the spirit, because the spirit is who a person is.
Anyone can pretend to be nice, or put on a front, but the spirit of a man shows
whom he really is. Discern Discern Discern!
Earlier on Facebook I made this status:
So I'm watching
'Waiting to exhale'....the one lady Robin (she dates at least 3 different men
during the movie and ends up pregnant at the end of the movie) is seeing the
different sides of the men she's involed with. One takes her to a party and
does drugs and gets drunk, another she's not really attracted to and the one
she does love is just no good.
-I know at the end of
the movie she realizes she is worth more than the guys she has settled for, but
let's deal with the time she is settling-
Now as Christian
women we are taught that the man should pursue us. Our "Adam" will
identify us as his wife. Our "Boaz" will go to the elders before
making us his wife. However, every man
that is pursuing you is not one you have to date or should date. Just because a
man wants you to meet his momma, doesn't mean he's worthy of dating you.
No we aren't to be
pursuing men, but yes we can decline a pursuit. Don't settle just because you're getting attention. If he
isn't exhibiting the 4 p's (priest,prophet,protector,provider)then don't
bother.
No settling and no
randoms, regardless of how "fine" he is.
#guardyourheart #knowyourworth
Now I’ve mentioned the 4 P’s before, but I can’t take credit
for it. One day I was speaking with one of the ministers at my church about
relationships and he brought them to my attention.
Priest: is a minister.
Prophet: an inspired teacher or proclaimer of the will of God.
Protector: a person that protects someone of something
Provider: a person that provides
A husband should be able to minister to his wife.(as well as
she ministers to him) A husband is the head of his family, and he should be
able to teach his wife and family, as God teaches him. A man in general is made
to protect, so should a husband protect his wife. A husband should provide for
his wife/family. (Don’t let the world fill your head up with being so independent
that you don’t allow you husband to do the things he SHOULD do as not only a
man, but a man of God.) Genesis 1:27
says “So
God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and
female he created he them”. The imagine of God, is to say the likeness
of God: morally, emotionally and mentally. Those 4 things are just some of the
things God is to us.
Now when the minister at my church brought this to me he
used an analogy. He said the 4 P’s or like the wheels of the car. You have to
have all 4 or you won’t go anywhere. If you have a man that provides and
protects, but isn’t a prophet (he can’t teach you the word), and he isn’t a
priest (he can’t minister to your various situations) then what do you really
have?
See for me relationships are all about growth, not just
romantic relationships, but friendships also. I want to be in a state of
continual growth. I never want to get stagnate in my relationship with Christ,
and I never want to not be able to learn or grow. If you aren’t learning or
growing along this journey, that means you are being hindered by something. You
are either hindering yourself, and you’d have to be honest with yourself and
God to see what that is. You might be hindered by a relationship, or by a
friendship. Is anybody worth stopping your growth in Christ? People will either
grow together, or grow apart, and you have to be okay with that. You can’t make
a person be what they aren’t, and you can’t hold on, you just have to accept
it.
I know the world teaches us to have a long laundry list of
things our husband should and shouldn’t have. (Remember, we are in the world,
but not of it. We don’t operate the way that they do. Yes you can still have standards;
no-one is saying to do away with them.) Honestly, when you are allowing God to
transform you, and work on you, that list becomes shorter. You are more likely
to show others grace, because of the grace God shows to you. You are less impressed
and interested in what he has material wise and more interested with what he has in his eternal savings account.
You are more so concerned with his relationship with Christ, his spirit, and
his willingness to be a vessel for The Lord, what type of father he will be to
your children and things like that.
I just wanted to encourage my sista’s (and brothers)
tonight. Don’t let the devil have you thinking that you aren’t worthy of
someone great. (Don’t allow your past, having you think you are unworthy,
remember anyone that is in Christ, is a new creature. The old is done away
with, all things are new.)Talk to God and let him show you, your true desires
of your heart, and ask him to make his desires, your desires. Know that you are
worthy, and every person that gives you a compliment, or gives you attention
isn’t necessarily the one for you. On the other hand, if no-one is approaching
you, or giving you attention, know that God might be hiding you, because he’s
working on you. A relationship is a two person thing, you might be ready, but
the person God has for you might require some work. Be patient and wait on The
Lord. I know it’s hard at times, but I honestly believe it is worth it. Wait I
say.
If you love someone
tell them
I love you
Destaynee
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