From reading
the title, I’m sure your brain has already formulated reasons as to why a Christian
would leave their local church. Reasons like money hungry pastors, taking
multiple “offerings”, preachers preaching word that is not sound doctrine,
preaching opinion’s and personal biases as opposed to the gospel, preaching
prosperity and not salvation, messy ministries, and church member’s etc. There are
various reasons why a Christian would leave their local church.
Have you
ever met someone that was spiritually sound, but when it came time to inquire
about what church they attend, they say “Oh I don’t belong to a local church”,
and when you invite them to your church, they say “Oh thank you, but I’m sure I
won’t be visiting”. When I heard this response, I was like wow she either doesn’t
feel the need to have an under-shepherd who she can learn from and grow
spiritually, or she’s been hurt by the church in the past. I usually go with
the latter, because what Christian wouldn’t want to learn and grow more
spiritually? I can’t judge people that leave their local church because
recently I’ve been faced with the same decision.
Now there is
nothing bad I can say about my local
church. I love my Pastor and the
ministers, and the minister’s wives, and some of the other lovely people I’ve
come in contact since being here.( a lot of them, have really embraced me,
especially me being a single mother) The only problem I have with the physical
church(any church), are the people inside, pretending and posing to be a part
of THEE church. I’m talking about the “aints”, not to be mistaken as saints. (I
know someone somewhere is saying, well aren’t you judging folks?) Well
somewhere in 1 Thessalonians 5:12 is
says “And we beseech you, brethren, to know them which labour among you, and
are over you in the Lord and admonish you” and in the 22nd verse says "Abstain from all appearance of evil". You need to know who you’re dealing
with. You need to know not only so you can guard your heart, because you can’t receive
everything from everyone. Also so you can know how to speak to them, can’t feed a baby meat, they need milk.
So it’s not for judgmental reasons.
For the record, leaving the local
church does not mean one has turned their back on God or on their faith. It’s
not easy to deal with God’s “special” children. Also Church is for relationship
reasons, building your relationship with Christ. Not for ritual or social
reasons. Sadly a lot of Christians don’t realize they are doing things
religiously and for social status within the church instead of for their
relationship with Christ or fulfilling their service to God. Only what’s done
for God will stand.
Just because one leaves their church doesn’t
mean they can’t do God’s work. A lot of
ministries (in my opinion) might be more effective if they got involved more
with the community. Reach those that are ashamed to come to the church because
of the judgment and lack of love and mercy shown to those that may have fallen.
God meets us where we are; let’s meet others where they are too.
I’ve been
faced with the decision to leave my local church or to stay. I know you’re
wondering, well Des if you love your church so much, what would cause you to contemplate
leaving it? That’s a very fair question.
As I stated
more so on facebook and twitter, past few months have been extremely rough.
Long story short some unresolved issues within my family resurfaced causing a
major disconnect and misunderstanding and miscommunication. A man from my
church, whom I thought was trustworthy (because I saw him in church, he was
friendly not only to my son, but to other boys wanting to learn to play the
drums) extended his hand to help my son and I out during these trying times opened
his house to my son and myself. Granted
during this time I was depressed, had an anxiety attack, my world was up in the
air and I wasn’t sure what was what. I was extremely vulnerable. This man who
is 30years plus years my senior posing to have the 4 P’s (a provider, a priest,
a protector and a prophet) but really had the other 4 P’s( predator, pretender,
perpetrator, and phony) not only preyed on my vulnerability, but took advantage
of it. Manipulation, control, scare tactics using God, twisting of scripture to
not only get what he wanted, but to control and scare to say the least. This
person lied/shared about everything I’ve disclosed to them to other people,
probably more than I know.
I know you’re
saying well Destaynee, you’re very mature spiritually how could you allow
someone to twist scripture and do all these things. Again, fair question, but
until you’re in the situation you’ll never know how you’ll respond. I was at
one of the lower points of my life and felt as though I had no one. I was a
perfect candidate for someone with a sinister plan and scheme; I appear quite
vulnerable being a single parent who writes a very transparent blog. One
thing is for sure is that I’m a child of God, and God has a great way of
protecting his children. Though this experience has been traumatic to Daniel
and myself, God held my hand through it all, and he will continue to.
Age does NOT equate wisdom nor does it equal spiritual soundness or
spiritual understanding or correct interpretation of the scriptures.
False prophets are NOT limited to the tv screens, or the
pulpit. They are everywhere on fb, Twitter, in the church, in the choir, etc...
Don’t be fooled into thinking false prophets only "look" one way. Everyone in the church.... is not in
THEE church.
Know God for yourself, know the word
for yourself and discern, discern
discern!
Also if a person has to convince you they are being “led” by
God, they usually aren’t, and are just using God to manipulate you. When a
person is led by God, they don’t have to announce it every time “God speaks to
them”, because of the peace God will give to those in the situation.
(Disclaimer: My blog is not to bash,
anyone or anything I talk about. It is solely to give my experiences and to
share what I’ve learned. I know I’m not the only person facing the things I’ve
faced, so I’m giving a voice to those too shy to speak up or a relief to those
that think they are alone. Being a PK, I know what it’s like not being able to
talk to anyone, so I want to be that for others, and I want my blog to be that
for others also. We will overcome by the blood of the lamb, and the word of our
testimony. Testimony’s are to be shared, regardless of how small or how big,
how popular or unpopular. Every time I write, I’m risking judgment, from my
peers, family, friends, strangers whomever. I’m to the point, where my life is
not about me. We go through things not only for us to learn, but to help
someone else, and for God to get the glory. My whole life is a testimony of God’s
love for me, his keeping power, being my provider, his mercy and grace showered
upon me. I can’t keep quiet about it, no matter how a person may look down on
me or exile me.)
As far as me
leaving my church, I feel my reasons would be valid, but satan, can’t beat me
that easily. If I can sit in the same building with a man that raped me, surely
I can be in the same building as someone that tried to ruin me and my family.
Forgiveness is divine, trust me, I couldn’t do it on my
own.
If you love someone tell them
I love you
Sincerely,
Once was blinded, but now has perfect
vision.
Destaynee
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