What men look for in a woman

So today is Valentine ’s Day, while everyone is out celebrating I was at work for a few hours. I totally didn’t mind. I know my mini was waiting at home for me to play games with him, and because I was working with one of my favorite co-workers. Every time we work together, we end up having an inspiring conversation. Tonight was no different, I was inspired, somehow we ended up talking about what men look for in a woman.

Disclaimer: these are not tips on how to get a man. How to be a wife, How to get married or how to get a man to propose to you. lol Again this is just sharing some of a conversation I had with my co worker. :)

·        Confidence

·        Spiritual strength

·        Willingness to “take care” of her man

·        Appearance

Now I know there are more things look for in a woman, and this is totally subjective to him. (We know that all men are different, but I’m sharing the things HE emphasized. The things we talked about, which I think are meaningful, and women should know. This is in no particular order)

The first thing my co-worker mentioned was Confidence. He said “there’s nothing like a woman that is sure of her-self and is powerful. She takes care of her business and doesn’t take no for an answer. She walks in her authority”. Now I know you may be thinking, confidence can easily lead to arrogance, aren’t we supposed to be meek? Yes we are to be meek and humble. However, confidence does not equate pride, or arrogance. Confidence is much like contentment, being satisfied with what you have and who you are, trusting God for what he gave you. Confidence isn’t only appealing in how you look, but with who you are. Being confident in the skin you are in, be it your appearance, the spirit within you, or the gifts God blessed you with. Being sure of whom God made you to be. It all goes back to Trusting God. Trusting that God gave you what he felt is best for you, for the person you are becoming.

Spiritual strength equates spiritual maturity, to me. Being mature in Christ,  a practicing Christian, responded to the call, growing in Christ. He made mention to a woman being able to recognize evil and deny her flesh. Being strong enough to do what required of you even when you don’t want to. Which he also mentioned was something he deals with to. Honestly we all do. That’s why Paul says we have to die to our flesh daily. Our flesh is naturally going to what to do things against the spirit, but we have to be strong enough to slay those fleshly desires and do what the Holy Spirit is leading us to do. (We all fall short of the glory, no need to act like we don’t and certainly no need to beat ourselves up because of it. This is why Jesus Christ came down, to save us of our sins, our short comings. He knew we could not fulfill the law. That is why we thank God for his grace and his everlasting mercy)

Willingness to “take care of her man”.  He made mention of a woman cooking for him and cleaning etc. You guys know I’m a part of the “boyfriends don’t get husband benefits club”. However, I don’t see anything wrong with cooking for your guy every now and then. Doing some of the things he likes, playing video games, watching games, working out etc. Giving him your undivided attention, and letting him know he’s appreciated. Notice I didn’t say anything physical (By physical, I mean sex). In my opinion “taking care of your man” doesn’t always have to be physical, especially if you aren’t married! Everyone wants to know they are cared for and that they matter. So do the things that matter to him. I know a lot of women don’t like to “get dirty”. They don’t want to sweat out their perms, or puff out their edges, but what will it hurt to spend time with someone you love?  Time is the best way to show someone you care. You can’t get it back, we all look for something in return, and time is something that is not returnable, so spending it shows you care. Let people know you care, by spending time.

Now of course appearance was on the list. Men are visual creatures as we know, but this wasn’t the typical “she needs to be thick” conversation that some guys like. This was a not being influenced by the media conversation. Accepting yourself for who you are, regardless of your build, the lack, and the extra on the side whatever. As women we are always being told we need to look a certain way. 85 % (this is a guess, not an actual percentage) of women don’t look like how the media says we should look. Not everybody is going to have waist length hair and green eyes with an hour glass figure, not naturally! Everyone is going to look like the Victoria secret models, but that is what makes us unique! We need to accept that and be okay with that. That acceptance of your appearance ties in to the confidence. When you accept yourself, you are confident with whom you are, and it will exude from you.(Just like if you aren't confident in who you are, it WILL exude from you.) People will be able to feel it when they see you.

I always say “a King recognizes a Queen, but a King is attracted to a Queen that knows she’s a Queen”.

Do you know you’re a Queen?

Do you walk in your Queen-ship with confidence?

-if a guy can’t handle you in your Queen-ship, he’s probably a “peasant” posing as a King. A King will promote a Queen in her Queen-ship, not see it as difficult, or “too much”-

If you love someone tell them

I love you

Destaynee