Half naked pic's?

To the girl on my newsfeed and to the girl on my timeline:

You’re worth much more than posting half naked pic’s. 

Sure you’ll get a lot of attention, but those guys just want to hit the like button, and smash the save and download button. 

Don’t you know a man would be happy to find you? 

But he won’t be able to find you if you’re hiding behind your hips, breast and thighs. 

Help redirect his eye’s from your body to your mind.

 Sis understand, a man that’s worth your time will need you to stimulate more than his body, but his mind.

 Sis every man doesn’t need to know you’re a brick house before your husband knows. 

We can see that you got it going on in your regular clothes. 

Getting half naked for what?

 I guess you’re trying to convince yourself?

Since I can't hug and have a sit down conversation with some young ladies, I just free-styled this poem in the form of a letter because when I logged on to my facebook this afternoon, (besides the pictures of kids on their first days of school) were of women half dressed. Half-dressed club pic’s, or just dressed regularly but exposing more than what should be. I know a lot of the secular artist and “creative” people like to try to convince women that being naked or half naked is a form of self-expression. They try to convince you that you are liberated by wearing as much or as little as you want to. Please don’t be fooled by that logic. They are just getting women to do exactly what they wanted the whole time, to be exposed.

When I was younger, when I didn’t know my worth I wore exposing clothes. When I didn’t think I was pretty or felt confident I wore exposing clothes. I KNEW my body was on point. I knew it would grab attention of members of the opposite sex, but it was because I had self-esteem issues. I had no self-worth; I didn’t know how valuable I was. I didn’t even love myself. I would use my body as bait, to hook the attention of men. It still got me NO-WHERE because they only came because they thought they were getting something I wasn’t giving. I was false advertising. (The saying is dress how you want to be approached. If you’re dressed like a whore, you will be approached as one. Although I don’t think people should be treated that way, that’s how it is.)

This is one of my back in the day, lukewarm photos. Seeing this picture saddens me because I know how hurt I was. I was still celibate during this time, but still wanted male attention. Brings back memories of literally having to fight drunken men off me while walking to my car after the club. So not only was I searching for attention, but once I got it, it wasn't what I wanted nor needed. Lots of times coming home from the club, I'd call my friend Nick and just cry. Such a sad and lonely time.

I can praise God because he showed me I was much more than what I was portraying myself as. I was much more than a girl with a nice body, and sis so are you!!

The men that will make great husbands aren’t chasing after the chicks that are exposing everything to the internet. They are admiring the women that are dressed modestly yet cute. Ladies the bible tells us to dress modestly and humbly, that does not mean homely. You can still be fashionable, modest, sophisticated and cute. Exposing your body does not equate fashionable, it equates desperate for attention, “thirsty”, lack of confidence, and low self-esteem.

It pains me to see a woman exposing herself because I know exactly how she’s feelings, because I was once there. There is something in your life that is not making you feel whole, complete, or valuable so you have to try to find your worth by using your body. I may not be the most attractive woman or any of those things, but I’m feeling the most confident about myself than I ever have. I never felt this confident until I found out what God said about me, what he thought of me and what he feels about me. I was never this confident until I took the time to place God’s opinion of me above the opinions of the media, the guys, the women everybody. This confidence is because of the confidence I have in my God. I know that what he put in me is priced far above anything that can be seen on the exterior. Ladies and men, know that the person that is worthy of you is the person that is willing and wanting to look at your heart first. The person that is able to look past what you are or aren’t “working with”.

As Christians we always say “I want people to see God before they see me” well sis they aren’t going to be able to see God, if you have your girls hanging out your shirt. Or if you have your skirt so short we can see up your back.

Understand that presentation IS everything. We judge how good a meal is going to be by the way the plate is presented to us. We judge how clean a store is by its outward presentation. We don’t even go into certain neighborhoods because of how the entrance looks. So sis if your outward presentation is saying worldly, video girl, hoochie momma, what god are you REALLY representing?

I’m not saying don’t wear shorts, don’t wear skirts, leggings! NO NO NO because I wear them too. Just be MINDFUL of the way you wear them, especially if you are representing God, especially if you want to be approached and addressed in a certain manner, be MINDFUL of how you present yourself.

Sis this is all said with love. I just want you to know that your worth won’t be found in how you or your body looks, but in God’s word. He has your worth waiting for you to seek him so he can give it to you. Nothing is more liberating and freeing than knowing that people’s opinions and expectations don’t matter just God’s. You’ll be free knowing that your appearance is fine in God’s eye’s you don’t have to buy sizes too small for him to think your beautiful or amazing, he gave you everything you have, just maximize on living for him and he will send the right man your way.

This picture was taken at my church for our a.r.m.y conference. Me, my son and Mali music. This picture is an example of being modestly dressed yet still cute (in my opinion) Not only to you have to put everything on display to look cute, but you can be modest and still feel cute!

Just as you trust God to wake you up every morning, trust him with your self-worth and self-confidence. Don’t depend on the word or the rating system of social media to give it to you, depend solely on Christ.

If you love someone tell them

I love you

Destaynee